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Tag: Whining

One Simple Rule For Whining

Family

Whining happens. Especially when children are tired, hungry or bored. One rule has been effective in turning things around.

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July 22, 2015

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It’s the last day of school. Walking behind our

It’s the last day of school.

Walking behind our daughters to the bus left me with mixed feelings. I’m proud of all the kids’ accomplishments and can see so much growth.

Some years feel harder than others and I’m grateful that this year has truly been a year of thriving. A year when they have had to figure out more of who they are and to learn how to be who they are without hiding it. They have grown in confidence and skill at school, activities, church, and home. They have had to grow in empathy and compassion and have had to learn how to be better friends and siblings. New friends have come alongside, and long-time friendships have been refined and strengthened. It is a precious gift to witness our kids becoming more of who God has made and is making them to be.

While this has been a year of thriving, there have been hard things too—challenges, hurts, and being pushed out of their comfort zones. These struggles have grown their understanding of the world and others. Some of these lessons have been as hard on my mama heart as they have been on theirs.

Our middle child is heading to her last day of elementary school. As she says goodbye to a place that has helped her grow and to some friends who are heading to different schools next year – there have been tears. At the same time, there has been anticipation and excitement about joining our oldest in middle school. She’s excited to start band, switch classes, and meet new friends. I recognize her desire for more responsibility and independence. While I am excited to see her grow into middle school, I am also sad to leave this season.

Sadness. Joy. Excitement. Nervousness. They all exist together.

What does the last day of school feel to you?

#grateful #thisgratefulmama #hellosummer #lastdayofschool #mixedfeelings #allthefeels

This bench caught my eye because it is my favorite

This bench caught my eye because it is my favorite color. Looking closer, I can see the color is the product of fading from use and sun. The sun will eventually bleach it to white, exposing all its imperfections. There are scratches and dents where people and things have left their mark. There are carved initials where people made an effort to leave deep wounds and scars. After observing the condition of the bench, I first thought it needed to be painted and restored to its original color. But it is already beautiful as it is.

This beat-up bench isn’t that different from us. We, too, have acquired imperfections. Unlike the bench, which can’t think or act, and many of our marks are self-inflicted by our own decisions and actions. But like the bench, we also have scars and battle wounds from intentional and unintentional work of others. By God’s grace, He is also making us more beautiful over time, in spite of our blemishes.

We all start life, wired to follow our own plans and desires. The world celebrates our uniqueness (to a point) and tells us to do what we think is best. Without Jesus, we follow our hearts and blemishes build up, but nothing makes us beautiful. We end up dirty and broken, not white and made clean by our Savior.
It is only our repeated, long-term exposure to the SON that makes us beautiful in time. Our exposure to Him slowly strips our pride, selfish plans and desires away. God did make us wonderfully unique and He celebrates that. But our worldly color needs to be blended with Jesus, so we can reflect Him to the world. Our willfulness becomes muted and beautiful as we follow our Good Shepherd.

As we become more like Jesus, we desire to serve God and to love others well. We lay down our plans and desires and seek Him first. Even when our battle wounds are exposed, we don’t need to cover them up by refreshing the worldly parts our ourselves. They are part of our story, and part of the beautiful thing God is working out in and through us. We surrender to God’s plan for us to humbly serve, to provide encouragement and rest to others, out of our love for Him.
#changeisgood #beingmadenew #notmywillbutyours #thisgratefulmama

I didn’t choose a word for 2023, but missed it.

I didn’t choose a word for 2023, but missed it. Choosing a word is a simple way to keep one goal front and center. One word is easy to remember, and provides an opportunity to stay focused on a the big picture.
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My 2024 word of the year is ‘Pray’. Pray is a verb, requiring action.
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In all honesty, I didn’t pray enough in 2023, and it showed. I got in a rut of doing all I can do to tackle problems before praying and asking God to lead. Frankly, it didn’t go well. My anxiety increased, as often happens when following the path of self reliance.
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So, in 2024, pray first. Pray often. Pray for myself, for others, for the world. Pray in grief, in thanksgiving, in joy, in suffering. Pray through anxiety, doubt, anger, and confusion. Pray in the mundane, the busy, and the places I am most confident and self reliant.
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I need this to keep my will centered on God, and to remind myself of who He is, what He promises and what He has done and will do.
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“16 Rejoice always, 17 pray without ceasing, 18 give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.” -1 Thessalonians 5:16-18.
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#pray #givethanks #prayer #2024 #2024wordoftheyear #2024goals #thisgratefulmama #praywithoutceasing #praymore #notmywill #noneedforselfreliance #praythrough

“Any concern too small to be turned into a praye

“Any concern too small to be turned into a prayer is too small to be made into a burden.”

-Corrie Ten Boom

#newyear #wordoftheyear #thisgratefulmama

Happy Mothers Day! #thisgratefulmama

Happy Mothers Day!
#thisgratefulmama

Happy National Coffee Day! . If we are going to ce

Happy National Coffee Day!
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If we are going to celebrate coffee, we must look to the One who made it. God certainly knew what He was doing!
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How do you take your coffee?
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#whatsinyourcup #coffee #allthecoffee #needcoffee #coffeeday #nationalcoffeeday #grateful #thisgratefulmama

Transitions are my nemesis. . I don’t like chang

Transitions are my nemesis.
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I don’t like change. I wrongly love my routine and ability to ‘manage’ what I know and expect. But change is here.
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It feels like our fall schedule has marched in with a hammer. And that hammer has wreaked havoc on ‘my plans’. So many things have all begun at once, that I am in that unfamiliar, unwanted, underwhelming place where I’m just trying to keep up and keep on.
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The quiet and calm of last year has escaped me. In many ways, I don’t actually long for it-it was lonely, isolating, and hard. But the idea of the predictable days and slow pace is appealing. But I don’t really want it back. This full schedule is a sign of kids thriving, purpose in the places I get to serve God, getting to reconnect with family and friends, kids in school, and taking care of necessary appointments. These are all good things. But it’s also a lot.
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I’m exactly where God wants me. My schedule and all the challenges and changes do not surprise Him. He knows all, and has no limits. Equipping me to do what He has called me to do at home, at BSF, at church, and in our community isn’t a problem. God is faithful to provide all I need, and His presence to comfort and guide me.
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Eyes up.
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#eyesup #fixyoureyesonjesus #transition #change #fallschedule #humility #thisgratefulmama #heisfaithful #lookup #thankful #faith #faithinfluencer #september

What would change about this day if we approached

What would change about this day if we approached our conversations with humility? Humility is hard to develop because we are taught to fight for ourselves, to chase our dreams (even at the expense of others) and to assert our rights. We fear being a door mat.
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But humility doesn’t mean people walk all over us, or that we never fight for what is right, or that we don’t achieve our dreams. It’s more about HOW we live and our disposition towards God and others.
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I’ve been thinking about how humility and how it is lived out. This list is a start, and not things I’ve achieved.
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-I am not God. I’m limited in my knowledge and abilities
-God really does know the best way to live
-God is good and can be trusted to lead
-set aside assumptions and give others the chance to speak and explain
-seek to understand, not to persuade or prove a point
-engage in compassion and empathy
-recognize my imperfections and inadequacies
-extend grace freely as God has extended grace to me
-ask God to reveal my pride and blind spots
-just listen
-consider others’ perspectives and experiences
-see everyone, even those who disagree with us, as image-bearers of God
-treat all with respect whether it has been earned or not, because of their worth to God
-let the Holy Spirit lead our conversations and when to speak or be silent
-ask God if what we are upset about, researching, or debating is something He wants us to keep chasing
-choose to respond, not react
-honestly consider if my tone, words, and body language reflect Jesus
-default to kindness, gentleness, and patience
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Lord, help us! We can’t do this on our own. We are prideful and need you to grow our humility. Where we can’t, you can. Help us live as described in Colossians 3:12-13.

“Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.”
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#humility #clotheyourselfincompassion #reflectjesus #seektounderstand #showcompassion #throwkindnesslikeconfetti #thisgratefulmama #noperfectpeople #wednesdaywisdom #goodmorning

First time to see, smell, and feel the ocean in 2

First time to see, smell, and feel the ocean in 2 years. Love these beautiful, wide open spaces that remind me just how big and generous God is to create all this.
#hellomaine #ocean #wideopenspaces #allcreationsingshispraise

Thank you, @ursalabsllc for making this cutie’s

Thank you, @ursalabsllc for making this cutie’s day with this 3D printed kitty.
#allthingsblue #thankyou #3dprinting #buylocal #smallbusiness #thisgratefulmama

"May . . . it’s full of all the things that make

"May . . . it’s full of all the things that make spring and the brighter part of the year so special. Flowers bud, the sun shines, and new seeds are sown into the fabric of our lives. May is awesome." ―Jenna Danchuk
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#may #hellomay #spring #springtime #ilovespring #timeflies #thankful #thisgratefulmama

“He is not here; he has risen, just as he said.

“He is not here; he has risen, just as he said. Come and see the place where he lay.”
Matthew 28:6
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The resurrection changes everything.
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Without it, our faith is worthless.
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If Jesus didn’t raise from the dead, He was just a man who lived a good life and died with good intentions of saving others. Who selflessly forgave the very people who were crucifying Him.
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If He didn’t rise again, Jesus simply was not who He claimed to be.
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But He IS. Jesus is God’s only Son. He did rise, just as He said He would. When the tomb stone rolled back and He burst from the grave, He fulfilled hundreds of Old Testament prophecies.
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Jesus accomplished what no one else could. His death showed His humanity. His resurrection proved He is God, and unlike any other man to ever walk the earth.
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He is our Savior. King. Living priest, interceding on our behalf. He is the promise keeper and life giver. With His life, he paid for my sin, and yours. Jesus, the death-killer has already declared victory over the grave, sin and death. And He isn’t done. He is coming back to make all things new.
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He has risen indeed. And because of Him, we are free indeed. So we declare with expectant hope - Come, Lord Jesus!
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He is risen. Happy resurrection day.
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#heisrisen #indeed #hehasrisen #hehasrisenindeed #easter #hope #theresurrectionchangeseverything #faith #faithinfluencers #thisgratefulmama #freeindeed #savedbygrace #savedbyjesus #jesussaves #deathkiller #hope #resurrectionday

It’s Good Friday. . Reflecting on the selfless,

It’s Good Friday.
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Reflecting on the selfless, loving sacrifice of our willing and humble Savior. And my part in putting Him on that cross.
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My sins require death. My sins of action and inaction. My sins of thought and attitude. My prideful and self-centered ways and my patterns and habits. Each sin is against God. Jesus had to die because I am a helpless sinner-unable to save myself for eternity or to repair my relationship with God without Jesus.
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Grace is God’s righteousness, at Christ’s expense. Given freely to me. Mercy is God not giving me the eternal punishment and separation from Him that I do deserve.
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Reflecting on the hymn, ‘Jesus Paid it All’ today:
“I hear the savior say
Thy strength indeed is small
Child of weakness, watch and pray
Find in me thine all in all
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Jesus paid it all, all to him I owe
Sin had left a crimson stain
He washed it white as snow
Lord, now indeed I find
Thy power and thine alone
Came and changed the lepers spots
And it melt the heart of stone
Jesus paid it all
All to him I owe
Sin had left a crimson stain
He washed it white as snow
He washed away
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And when before the throne
I stand in him complete
Jesus died my soul to save
My lips shall still repeat
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Jesus paid it all
All to him I owe
Sin had left a crimson stain
He washed it white as snow
Oh He washed
Yeah He washed it white as snow
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Oh, praise the one who paid my debt
And raises life up from the dead
Oh, praise the one who paid my debt
And raises life up from the dead
Oh, praise the one who paid my debt
And raises life up from the dead”
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Amen.
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#jesussaves #jesus #jesuspaiditall #hymn #hymnoftheday #goodfriday #sundayiscoming #easter #holyweek #journeytothecross #faith #faithinfluencer #mysinputjesusonthecross #mysinputhimthere #savedbygrace #grace #mercy #graceupongrace #uncommongrace #joy #thisgratefulmama #reflect #hope

I you love God, who does He say you are? . Created

I you love God, who does He say you are?
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Created by God
Redeemed by Jesus
You are His
He will be with you
Protected
Precious
Honored in His sight
Loved
Bought at a high price
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But now, this is what the LORD says— he who created you, Jacob, he who formed you, Israel: “Do not fear, for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name; you are mine. When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze. For I am the LORD your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Savior; I give Egypt for your ransom, Cush and Seba in your stead. Since you are precious and honored in my sight, and because I love you, I will give people in exchange for you, nations in exchange for your life.
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Isaiah 43:1-4
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#thisgratefulmama #whogodsaysiam #whogodsaysyouare #wordbeforeworld #redeemed #lettheredeemedofthelordsayso #goodmorning #thankful #iamhis #donotfear #thelordwithus #jesus #holyweek #grateful #faithinfluencer

I’m noticing an attitude of discontentment while

I’m noticing an attitude of discontentment while doing my daily stuff at home, with the kids and more. I find myself frustrated by the volume of laundry, snack bowls on the counter and toys left unattended.
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It isn’t that these things don’t need to be done, or that our kids shouldn’t be responsible for their own stuff. Largely, they should be. But I don’t want my countenance towards them to be characterized with sighs, irritation and impatience.
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It can’t continue. These people who live in this house are not intruders. They are my family. My husband and kids are my people. Yet I find myself begrudgingly serving them (and myself).
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These attitudes are rooted in pride. As if I’m too valuable to do the dirty work, the monotonous work, and service work. Pride doesn’t bring joy, it leads to a puffed up ego and a grouchy demeanor.
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Today I’m praying for humility. For peace and joy in all I do, knowing it is done out of love for my people and for God. Service motivated by love is done in humility.
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Pride insists I be served; love serves freely and willingly. The work I do while annoyed may still get done, but the tone of the house because of my attitude communicates that my people are a burden. Pride yields only rotten fruit.
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“Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving.”
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Colossians 3:23-24
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What attitude are you wrestling today?
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#verseoftheday #wordbeforeworld #humility #humility2021 #servantheart #prayer #goodmorning #faithinfluencer #gratitude #thisgratefulmama #colossians323 #workasuntothelord #growinhumility #solongpride #rottenfruit

As we head towards Easter, I’m circling back to

As we head towards Easter, I’m circling back to looking at who Jesus claims to be and what He says He will do. It seems like the best place to start is His own words. Here are seven ‘I Will’ statements that Jesus made in the New Testament.
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I will give you rest (Matthew 11:28)
I will send the Holy Spirit (John 16:7)
I will love you (John 14:21)
I will never drive you away (John 16:37)
I will see you again (John 14:3)
I will do whatever you ask in my Name (John 14:14)
I will make you fishers of men (Matthew 4:19)
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As I read these and begin to unpack them, here is what stands out:
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He promises not just physical rest, but rest for the soul (spiritual rest)
He sent the Holy Spirit to help, guide, convict and teach us (God within us)
There is nothing we can do to lose His love (eternal security)
He welcomes all to come to Him, no matter what we have done (grace)
He is coming back (promise keeper)
He answers prayer as we seek Him (He is faithful)
He gives us a job to do - to love God, love people and make Him known (eternal purpose)
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There is so much more in each of these statements. For this day, I turn my eyes from my circumstances to Jesus. He is who He says He is. He will do what He says He will do. I am who He says I am, and so are you.
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Where are your eyes fixed?
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#iam #heis #goodshepherd #jesus #thisgratefulmama #iamthevine #faith #faithinfluencer #thewaythetruththelife #abide #rest #fixyoureyesonjesus #goodmorning #wordbeforeworld #hewill #eternalsecurity #easter #sundayiscoming #theresurrectionchangeseverything #restforyoursoul #restfortheweary #restforthesoul #spiritualrest #purpose #godgivenpurpose

The more I learn about St. Patrick, the more I lik

The more I learn about St. Patrick, the more I like him. And, the more I am confused by the way we celebrate the day named in his honor 🤷‍♀️
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“Christ be with me,
Christ within me,
Christ behind me,
Christ before me,
Christ beside me,
Christ to win me,
Christ to comfort and restore me,
Christ beneath me,
Christ above me,
Christ in quiet,
Christ in danger,
Christ in hearts of all that love me,
Christ in mouth of friend and stranger.”
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-St. Patrick
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#quoteoftheday #quote #quotes #stpatricksday #stpatrick #saintpatricksday #wordstoliveby #wordsofwisdom #christinme #faith #faithinfluencer

The cold weather is a great time to add to my read

The cold weather is a great time to add to my reading list! What are you reading?

We’re a month and a half into 2021 and I have be

We’re a month and a half into 2021 and I have been procrastinating about my word for the year. Why? Because I was hoping for a different one. Because I pridefully don’t want this one.
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Humility.
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To admit I want to grow in humility means I have to admit I need to grow. That I lack humility in areas of my life, in real life moments of my day, in my words, thoughts and actions.
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It’s truth. But I don’t really like it. Pride is a powerful thing. We can show humility, but lack it on the inside. Pride is sneaky! We can be truly humble one moment but later take pride in our humble response.
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Lately I’ve noticed I have been easily offended. Evidence I think a little too much of myself and struggle to extend the grace I receive freely from God. I’ve been trying to do things in my own power, failing to ask for help - which reveals my lack of dependence on God and a belief that I can do all the things on my own. Spoiler alert: I cannot. And trying is to my detriment and the detriment of those who have to live with a control freak.
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And, there’s more. So, here we go. In 2021 I’m praying for humility. More of it. An awareness of my lack. And an active turning towards a humble way of thinking and living. Not a show. A heart-change that flows outward.
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“Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.”
Colossians 3:12
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What word did you choose?
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#humility #humility2021 #wordoftheyear #wordoftheday #wordstoliveby #humilitycheck #prayer #heartchange #growinmaturity #growinhumility #needhumility #thisgratefulmama #2021goals #2021humility #faithinfluencer #verseoftheday #faith #christianblogger

The cold right now hurts your face, makes your eye

The cold right now hurts your face, makes your eyes water and tears freeze. It’s been subzero for a week, but this is colder than it’s been.
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This cold stretch reminds me of the year we moved into this house. The 2013-2014 winter is one of the coldest on record. It was -10 in December when we moved in. I saw this morning that the average temp for the winter season was 9.7 degrees. It was so cold, the pipes coming into our house and then-sparsely populated street froze in the ground. We had a mobile welder come and thaw the pipes outside in a blizzard. Then, weeks later, the pipes froze in the street. The main line! The city had to open the fire hydrant and leave it open with a fine spray of water until April to keep the water flowing.
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Yes. It’s cold, and I have no plans to go out today. But today, I choose to be thankful that this has been a mild winter, when we needed it. With the need to social distance, we have been outside more this winter than any other. Snow shoes, tubing, sledding and snow fires galore. All so we can stay connected and sane. This cold magnifies the blessings and God’s kindness and provision during this winter so far.
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Praying for a warm up, but enjoying the warmth and family time inside today.
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#minnesnowta #minnesotalife #subzero #godskindness #itscold #thecoldhurtsyourface #stayingwarm #thankful #grateful #minnesotawinter

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